Personal Meanings

This song speaks to me a lot as a trans man in general. While I'm not sure what the artist had in mind when writing it, it's likely that it was not trans men or mascs, but it's not like there's many songs about us to choose from. I only know about Self-Made by Dopamine regarding the rock genre when it comes to the trans man side of things.

The first line of the song I can apply to my heavy dysphoria early on without knowing what I was experiencing. I recieved the typical diagnoses of depression and anxiety with puberty being seen as the main culprit, hormone balance wise instead of gender wise. I was just mentally ill, I needed to change how I thought of things to be positive and take some SSRI's. Yet whenever I tried to relate to others in the same boat as me, I never truly felt understood.

The second line would relate much more to when I did start questioning my gender and identified as trans. I grew up in a conservative area, so it made sense to stay in the closet as much as I could until I was sure that transition would help me.

The pre-chorus, or well the three lines after the first two, come back to my self-discovery.